Lots of my surf bros have knocked up their betties.

They tell me I'm still being "selfish," while they've "matured" into leadership roles, bringing up the next generation of groms.

So should I father a Surf Army?  It would be kind of cool to have a bunch of twisted groms who'd do my bidding.

Paskowitz Family Photo

I've been trying to start a cult for years now, but it seems like adults are kinda hard to brainwash.

Is it time to think longterm, like Michelle "Clowncar" Duggar, mother of 18?

Or maybe we should "blind them with science" and pop out 8 lil' soldiers at once?

Octuplet Mommy

If I start all 8 mini-groms on a training program, I bet at least one will become a successful professional surfer.  Maybe I'll have half do CHEK training like Mick, while the other half train with the a Bra Boy like Taj.

Thoughts?