No, I'm not on the Gold Coast - I'm sitting out this particular bro-down. Why? A) The economy. B) I'm mostly hated and I mostly hate bro-ing down. C) There's more to life than the tour. D) All of the above.
Brad Gerlach Photo: Lewis Samuels
Bizarrely, the bro-down came to me yesterday, in the form of Brad Gerlach's Primo Beer Tour. I guess Primo stopped bottling back in '86, around the time Gerr won the Stubbies Pro. But retro is so hot right now, so Primo is back, and Gerlach is back with it, touring the coast in a motor home, sleeping with a stuffed monkey, giving away cases of beer to the unsung heroes of surfing - Glassers, sanders, ding-repairers... the under-appreciated.
Most of the glassing up here happens in Santa Cruz, so Brad gave me call and asked where they should go. Never one to turn down free beer, I took Brad on a tangential side-tour of our local Norcal Retro scene. We brought a case of Primo to the laconic crew at Mollusk, allowing me to make karmic amends for writing The . Then we stopped by Danny Hess's shaping room. Danny makes 5 beautiful airplane-wing, chambered wood boards a week. He's dedicated his life to hand-crafting gems for discerning surfers. I keep telling Danny that as soon as he has kids and the bills start piling up, he'll sell-out out and move operations to China. Malnourished children will hand-craft thousands of "his" magic boards, maximizing profit. This concept does not amuse Danny.
After a lifetime spent around surfing, it was fascinating to see how genuinely stoked Brad remains to talk story in a shaping room, beer in hand.
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- Gerbie gets a hand plane.
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- Hess Sticks.
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- Hess hand planes.
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- Hess production.
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- Hess shows the foil on Gerbie's hand plane.
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- Brad Gerlach.
All photos: Lewis Samuels
Cool photos, nice early stage mullet Gerr.
who’s gayer, Brad or Alex? Despite his apparent radness, there’s something very creepy about Gerr.
so your not covering the asp? Dang it, your firsthand coverage was about as legit and genuine as the surf media gets. Now I’ll be forced to watch the webcasts and formulate my own opinions. Talk about ripping off the band aid.
yeah, his coverage is good but do you really think this tool box is leaving to go to many CT’s throughout the year? All he needs to do is stare at the webcast and email surfers all day and voila he’s a writer! Using words like ‘tangential’ around a surf crowd helps too though I suppose
But I really wrote to comment on this Gerlach thing: Is thre any way we can get this guy out of our faces for the rest of his shithole surf career? I imagine its just a matter of time that Reef drops him but whats his next stunt after that? Playing the drowned surfer someone at CSI: Miami discovers on the beach and then taking that around to a bunch of shitty beer companies that are more washed up than he and pitching some kid of fucknut gimmick like bringing beer to people that his friend the Surfline writer will coveR?
Cruising the coast in an RV, handing out free beer? I don’t see the connection on how it will stimulate (significant) sales for the beer company though. However, Brad might be a raging alcoholic by the time his rig breaks down in friendly Oxnard. Hopefully he has some beer to ward off the locals. It’s time to cast down all the BS and just surf. If Brad shows up drink a beer, but this isn’t roots, it’s low tech propaganda.
Jesus ruleangatta and wills - having a bad day?
Brad is one of the bright spots in surfing today and the guy still surfs better than 1/2 the tour. Yeah, what an asshole for trying to make a living off doing the thing you love and are recognized for - I think that fucking idiot Brad should just die so we don’t have to look at his face anymore… you guys sound like the biggest barney’s on Earth. Don’t try to imitate Lewis Samuels.
How many beer companies even look at the grassroots level? Good article and I love the ignorance of saying the show Gerr was on was CSI Miami and it takes place on Santa Cruz Island… morons.
the guy who invented the Game is a bright spot in surfing?
Bradley Gerlach is a cloud of sweet smoke in room of insipid buffoons.
I think ruleangatta has a little aussie convict crush on that little seppo lewis. Seem like he’s tryin to single white female it up by talkin all smart and hard and stuff. nice try douche. Gerlach tears. if we wanted to hear your thoughts ruleangatta we’d go read your diary at jealous douchebag dot com.
Rulengatta- wow, such anger over Gerlach- you must be the guy that is always bitching in the line-up, working at in/out burger and angry because despite years of trying you still cannot surf. I suggest that you take your own “shithole surf career” and try taking off one just one 60 ft wave at Todos, Jaws or Cortez. When you pull back, shit your pants and paddle back to shore you will then understand, respect, and refrain from showing your ignorance. You need a good Hawaian beat-down to bring you back to earth. Why not start by renaming yourself- toolengatta- your a surf putz.
who is this monkey Rulengatta ? You need to learn to respect your elders and those that have the nuts to ride 80ft waves- you need to earn respect on the waves not on the message boards. Gerr has everyones respect you flea
Shadenfreud- could not agree more- I will buy ticket to Hawaii for this cat. Rulengatta you need a beat down you clown.
Rulengatta do you even surf ? Gerr is a legend- never followed the herd, has always done his own thing and rips. The game has benefitted tons of kids and he is always friendly in the lineups and not a wave hog or unapproachable pro- what planet are you from ?
How do I get Gerr’s job ??? Love that guy.
yeah gerr is a creep. always tells asian prostitute stories.
Good to see Primo making a comeback - they had a lock on the beer market when I was a kid in Hawaii in the 1970’s. Put out a case of Primo for the trashmen at Christmas - after Schlitz bought the brand, it was so bad the trashmen wouldn’t take it. They preferred Lucky Lager. Ouch.
Let’s hope they get the beer right - if so, the market is theirs -
Cool hand planes. Love Primo.
pushingtide.blogspot.com/2009/02/island-cane.html
hey ruleangatta - harsh about Gerr. sounds like he either stole your wave or your girlfriend. enjoy your Bud Lime.
wow. great to see Perez Samuels has a price. SELL OUT. Made a “PRIMO” beer write up on Brad Gerr to tell everyone how refreshing and true to surfing Primo Beer is. Oh and also you can get that new Billabong Boarshort with Primo all over it as well. Cowabonga bros! Lets do it like Shane “Lame-O” Dorian does it cuz. he drinks Primo and hes from the islands broz.
jeez Samuels, your just as bad as the pro surfers who places a nose cone sticker on their board and sells their soul to be in next months surfer mag add to say how it saved his life because the board would have gone truly up his ass if it wasn’t for that nose cone.
Maybe people should pity Gerr, the fallen icon of a fad forgotten. That south jetty miracle rests as his laurel and his form has never found itself since. He stood tall that day as an alternative to Currens legacy and found himself years later facing obscurity. Tow ins with Parsons saved his act, but shilling extinct beers to shapers building “retro” garbage balances the equation. Aging gracefully has never been our strength and in that vein, I celebrate Brad.
Gerr is a world class athlete who is equally adept at artfully shredding a 4 foot wave as he is negotiating the face of a life-threatening giant 70–80 foot wave. I’ve seen him in the water and he is a gentleman who never uses his status to hog the lineup.
Until recently, surfing was never a sport where the best could ensure life time financial security even for the best in the sport. That is why there are so many sad stories of our surfing legends turning to less savory forms of employment and the unfortunate legal repurcussions.
Last I checked, notwithstanding the attempts of brObama and his administration to repeal it, we still live in a Capitalist society. Shouldn’t we applaud Mr. Gerlach for his efforts to be a productive and to help market an AMERICAN made beer? Let me speak in small words so that Rulengatta and Willis can follow. (I don’t know if they have dictionaries in their trailer homes)
Brad promotes Primo. People buy it. Primo bear is manufactured by American people. It is distributed by American people. It is sold by American people. Those people have jobs spend money and owners invest profits. No welfare. No unemployment. NO crime.
Presto: Capitalism in effect.
Don’t want to spend too much time on the Playa Hatas. Respect to Gerlach for pushing the limits of surfing and athleticism and for living a world of Vision and Possiblitity.
Dude
Gerr is not old what is wrong with you wankers
perez samuels. hehehehehe…..
that’ll stick.
who’s ever seen Brad with a woman?
Stu - are you kidding? He was on the tour in the late 80’s and early 90’s, he has probably scored more tail than you could ever imagine and has a live-in girlfriend right now… don’t make the homo call.
FREE BEER ?!? GO GERR!!!
Matt Branson, the tat covered hellman from Oz was on tour as well - didn’t stop him from claiming poofta later. I’m highly skeptical about any guy in his mid-40’s with a “live in girlfriend”.
One of the top 5 postsurf topics ever. Cool and simple, can’t believe guys were hating on one of the coolest living young legends in surfing.
Keep the good information comming, we need more authors like you!