Kelly Slater once told me that “there are very few pro surfers who have retired well.”
I thought of this while checking out the Billabong XXL wipeout of the year candidates. For over-the-hill pros who aren’t ready to walk away from the game there’s still one last resort – let go of a tow rope on death bowls.
Take Ross Clarke-Jones, for instance. His career has followed a simple and increasingly prevalent path: from hot grom, to World Tour pro, to paddle-in hellman, to tow hellman, to crash-test dummy.
In his thirties, Ross won the Eddie. Now in his mid-forties, he’s starting to take on some of the nuances of Mickey Rourke in The Wrestler.
For those that haven’t seen the film: Rourke portrays Randy, a washed up, drug-addled pro wrestler who is willing to sacrifice his body to extreme abuse in order to prolong his fame.
As the New Yorker noted, “The scenes in the ring, in which Randy, despite a heart attack, struggles to prolong the dregs of his appeal, are often hard to take.”
RCJ in the ring. Photo: Stuart Gibson
The same can be said of this shot of Ross Clarke-Jones. "I felt like I'd been hit by a baseball bat," RCJ said afterward. "I heard my neck crack and my face felt like it was completely rearranged. When I popped up to the surface, I could've sworn my nose and mouth were on the back of my head."
It seems like more than a coincidence that Ross just perfectly described the "completely rearranged" face of Mickey Rourke in The Wrestler.
It’s not my place to speculate on just how closely Clarke-Jones is mirroring the questionable habits of Rourke’s wrestler. But as Slater noted, it’s not easy for pros to find an honorable path into retirement.
In the meantime, the surf industry will hand out awards for the efforts of aging chargers – even when it’s not entirely clear if we’re awarding courage or desperation, foolhardiness or longevity.
What are they retiring to? A pillaged bank account and no education? A wife and mortgage that they haven’t had to spend any significant time with while they on the road with the boys?
“I really wanted to spend quality time with my family, watch my kids grow” is the rationalization you read each morning as the star athlete celebrates nothing left to do and a whole list of “honey do’s”.
Yeah, two weeks at home and you’re willing to die….. as long as it’s being filmed for posterity.
Lesson to learn children, travel often and travel well because Life will suffocate invigoration once your personal merry go round stops. And starting it up again is often not pretty, too many people have climbed on top and you have to push and push and push and push and it’s still not going as fast as it used to.
Life is not a dress rehearsal…… charge.
i concur and also recommend a contract with clauses for annual surf trips, day trips etc before marrying.
You just have to look at Gerr to see that all can be fine post surf-bro career. Shit, he’s got it all… mid-40’s, single, sponsored by Primo Beer and chasing waves with a guy he used to hate when he was younger. Man, he’s got it all! The only thing he’s missing is God - once he finds Him Gerr’s story-book life will be complete!
next step for RCJ—–>> born again Christian, I am sure that the Jesus community cant wait.
dude, not too long ago while wintering on the north shore i ordered pizza and Ross Clark Jones was the delivery guy, no joke. I was dumbfounded yet very stoked . . .
Seems to me that R.C.J. simply loves to ride gigantic waves and drive really fast in super expensive German sports cars. If Quiksilver is willing to pay him well for that than what is the problem? Is Lewis implying that Ross wipes out on purpose to get attention? Is Lewis saying that it would be more honorable if Ross took a rep job in Sydney instead of roaming the globe on Quiks dime hunting down waves that would make Stu shit his crotchless panties?
This guy is one of only two non-Hawaiians to win the Eddie ( the other is Slater ). I know that is nothing compared to winning comment of the week on this increasingly boring site but give the guy a little respect Lewis. You were funny at first with your jabs at the top 44 but now it has become obvious that you have nothing positive to say about anyone. Are you jealous of pro surfers? Do you sit in your pathetic little Sunset district studio apartment throwing darts at photos of David Eggars? ” You had it ALL punk. And you threw it away! If I had a chance like that I would be bodysurfing Hossegor with topless chicks between heats with Slater and A.I.! “.
P.S. Blasphemy Rottmouth’s act is getting stale.
P.S. Hey Mike try to stay away from giving serious, thoughtful advice on Post Surf. You sound like a geek.
and He has risen…Mark that is, from his umpteenth bed of self-banishment from this site. Rejoice!
One of my biggest problems with professional surfing is the indusrties willingness to exploit its more marketable members while never once taking the time to ensure that those people who have helped shaped the popularity of the sport reap its long term benifits. While I won’t comment on whether RCJ has fallen victim to this, people like Flea and other fring atheletes have. The fact is for every Tom Curren there are a hundred other broke, sponserless former pros with nothing to fall back on. While there pulling into death slabs the industry cheers them on, but when its over its over. Maybe providing something like health insurance, or better yet a 401K and a retirement plan for these guys would be a start.
You can’t take 14 year olds and tell them they rip for 15 years and then ditch them at 30 and expect it to work out.
How about people taking personal responsibility for their own lives. The ” industry ” doesn’t owe these guys anything. They were very fortunate to make a living doing what they love. Now they have to join the rest of us in the real world. You liberals always talk about people being ” owed ” something. From the government, the union or in this case the surfing industry. I have some news for you gentlemen. No one ‘ owes ” you anything. You are not ” entitled ” to shit. Deal with it.
Apparently, no one ever told ol’ RCJ about the joys of crystal methamphetamine. It’s sweeter than a virgin’s tears, and it takes you into retirement the only way a real man would ever want to go, friendless, moneyless and madder than King Lear.
I think our man Luís makes a good point but he ignores the fact that his all encompassing evil surf industry isn’t the only one at fault here. We are all complicit. We don’t want our heroes to fade quietly into upper-middle class suburban comfort. As you can see in Mike’s post, the very thought of it is too depressing for the upper-middle class suburban dwelling husbands and fathers who frequent these message boards to even contemplate. Ross Clarke Jones is getting flattened on 30 foot waves because WE enjoy seeing him there. It’s all part of The Dream, my friends. The idea of pros — especially the really crazy ones — settling town to lead a complacent, boring life like mine is abhorrent. Getting served a pizza by RCJ? That’s like getting your hair cut by Butch Cassidy — O’ how fallen.
So, yea, it seems logical that a lot of aging pro surfers are pretty desperate. Especially considering that their illustrious careers have trained them for this many pursuits in the big bad world outside of surfing: 0. That is a deep, dark hole to fall into at the age of 40, when a lot of guys are starting to think about the how to spend the money they’ve saved. In fact, if you compare a fate like that to the gaping mall of a 30 foot closeout, the wave starts to look pretty tempting…
RCJ has always been a charger- and you have to respect that- period. It does not matter that he was born in the early 60’s and he is getting soft around the middle. He is part of the elite that sits a lot deeper than you, is never worried about “that set from tibet” and at middle age is still surfing better than anyone in your line-up. Schadenfreude. That is what LS wants you to learn. Tow on little ducklings- back to your pond.
Like a phoenix he retuns form the ashes. Clear the way fooooooor……….(drums)……MMAAAAAAARK !!!!
I would much rather deal with being a broke 40 year old than a 30 foot closeout. Ted is fricken clueless.
And by the way Kookcoach. Ross never delivered pizza’s on the north shore. That was Noah Johnson before he made the big time. Get your facts straight barney.
Mark, glad you’re back. Nice response to Your Mom.
But, Mark, Ted wasn’t saying that RCJ HAD delivered pizza. Ted was pointing out that many careers, or low end jobs, don’t fit a pro’s or big wave specialist’s skill set.
I personally saw Ross Clark Jones slap a wild boar so hard, it shit out a slab of bacon and then pissed 10w30 motor oil for six days.
And there are rumors around Queensland that he slept with a toaster oven once, and never called it back.
Each of Ross Clark Jones’ sperm has a 7″ cock; when he ejaculates it looks like he’s pissing sea urchins.
it is the job of both aging Pro Surfers, and fired bloggers to entertain us. Both groups have been reduced to Circus Clowns, and it is their duty to entertain us with alarming pummelings and witty banter. Besides, without such entertainment all most web surfers do is wake up, hit the pit toilet to drop off a clutch of turtle eggs, and then fondle their marble bags at the computer? i for one don’t really want to see a 50 year old man die on a jagged reef in the middle of the Ocean, but much like reading Postsurf its a very entertaining car wreck.
P.S. Rottmouth is king!
Thanks for the kind words Mr. Disciple but KookCoach said he had delivered pizza’s not Ted. In the words of Scar in the Lion King ” I am SURROUNDED by IDIOTS”.
Can someone please taser Mark and throw him off a bridge.
rottmouth- Go AWAY, you perverted troll.
I’m curious, Mark, why you always throw the “you liberals” into your rants? I completely agree with your point about people taking care of themselves, yet I don’t assume for a moment that you and I share the same political leaning. Life’s not black and white (well, except maybe in Alabama), why are you?
Mark masturbates to Fox News played backwards and he was responsible for every racist Obama email we received last year. Mark even somehow convinced my grandma that Obama was a member of Al Qaeda.
Hey Stu maybe you are really a conservative who simply disagrees with the way America went into Iraq. That and you and Pirate Salsa are PISSED about Prop 8.
Well well, Mark is casting dispersions on his first day back in the playpen. Teetering between a long, flat summer on the rock and free golf in the swamp, Bama boy never ceases to amaze. And how creepy is it that he recites from the Lion king? Can he perform the entire Wizard of Oz?
Landbeforetime brings up an issue that should be addressed in the surfers manuel ( your welcome Lewis ). Before entering a contract of marriage, and that’s what it is, sign into law a provision that allows you to maintain the lifestyle that made you so attractive in the first place. So many victims of life’s pedestrian success watch from the sidelines as their wife’s best interest replaces theirs. Anyone over 30 knows the scenario as they watch their one time vibrant ‘bro’s” domesticated into the debt slaves of their wives ambition.
Seeing as Mark probably is quite single and has no friends, this lesson is a page from his future. Think twice before succumbing to an afternoon at church, the death march down the aisle and the kiss on the alter. A life sentence with an expensive pardon looming. And so many missed waves…….
Hey Mike. I don’t comprende you amigo. I am very happily married with a herd of beautiful, vibrant and normal children as well as a dog that would bite you for no other reason than, well, you are Mike from Post Surf. Put down the doobie before your next comment bro. I obviously have you on the ropes and you desparately need to think clearly right now before B. Rot. actually jumps in and takes my side for a change. And I sincerely do not think you could handle that.
Mark: 1
Mike: 0
“addressed in the surfers manuel”
manuel? this site has a built in spell checker. cmon
Fricken Artie probably surfs better than Dayyan Neve.
Mike was probably thinking of Pirate Salsa’s poolboy ‘Manuel from Michoacan”.
Mark left out the part of his family history where he went on the BangBus.com show, but got upset when it was revealed he couldn’t actually bang the bus. Always the rebellious one, he did it anyway. Now, Mark and the bus have 3 kids and live happily in Elmore County, Alabama.
I do not like how dayyan Neve surfs but he got ripped off on that last score.
Now they underscored Tim Boal. I smell a conspiracy.
What a great issue. Sure, home school. Who’s teaching the subject matter, Pops the dope grower? Or perhaps some other washed up 40 year old has-been.
What about NSSA, is there anything imparted on these kids about the importance of an education, or life in general?….dosen’t sound like the boy scouts to me.
I doubt if many really learn anything from travelling either. No effort to learn about culture or another language, but just cruising through, headphones blaring, to the next “sick punt dude.”
Maybe this is something the ASP should consider, instead of eliminating round one or round two. The stupidity seems to perpetuate, I don’t see too many “role models” on tour. Even in football they hand out suspensions and fines.
But, luckily, I guess, I’ve never really been a great surfer, and I put the bong down long enough to get an education, and it’s not my problem.
Wow, I didn’t even say COCK, or JIZZ, or TUG, or TOSS
You have to admit that Jihad surfs pretty well for having bifurcated hoofs in place of human feet. And the fact that he has no knees; just really long femurs doesn’t help anything. Maybe I’ve been too hard on the ol’ chap.
I’d like to think he’d fare pretty well as the first WCT competitor to surf a heat on stilts.
I’m ready to come out of retirement, you heard it here first fuckers. Strap me in and tow me into some exploited mainland pits with that limp dick Trust-a-farian, Brian Conley. His eyes won’t dry after I shoot a load in’em from my tuna can. That’ll be my glorious come back!
Seaside Pirates for Life!
Where is Occy’s Underbite? Could it be that todd turned him into a still-life by covering him in his glue?
I heard Glen Winton is working as a security man in the Gold Coast airport.
I wonder where’s Nick Wood, Derek Hynd, Richard Cram, etc, etc etc
I am starting to get tired of checking this site.
I am a WCT and WQS fan. All I care is about that.
I’ll give it a few more tries, but if I don’t see any comment on the WCT happening I am going to check in way less often.
o yeah that’s right Mark you were there when RCJ delivered the pizza. Duh, how could I forget about you that winter. It’s come back to me now . . . you were always going over the falls at ehukai while I was getting spit out of the barrel at pipe. I totally remember now.
“meanwhile the surf industry will continue to hand out awards for the efforts of aging chargers…” i like you mr. samuels, you are like one of those gay catty dudes on a supermodel reality show…, of course i’m no one to judge either…..
ps.can you teach me how to walk the runway?
some burn out, some fade away, some just flat out refuse and linger like the smell of a corpse. RCJ is a junkies junkie and will continue to fester until he is being towed into death slabs in an air chair by Gerlachs (illegitimate) great grandson. We will have to watch the sad bastard drooling and shitting his depends on the beach before paddling out to the next 1/2 Billabong in memory of Eddie (Quik being long since bankrupt) in 2068.
RCJ, age gracefully you remorseless pig fucker! You’re making the rest of us old wankers look bad.
Mark of course has it absolutely right when he says, “No one ‘ owes ” you anything. You are not ” entitled ” to shit. Deal with it.”
The industry owes no one anything at all beyond what they negotiate up front. That’s just life.
Lots of former pros turned industry leeches with cushy “jobs” as “reps” etc. are about to get pink slipped and have to work for the first time in their lives. No more golf and Lei Leis five days a week on someone elses dime.
Props to RCJ for hanging on to the dream any way he can. I doubt he will cry when he is broke and broken.
He’s true blue.
ps. I thought Glen Winton had the Krispy Kremes franchise for all of Australia? Nick Wood is doing time for indecent exposure? Derek is perfecting the art of surfing the boardless fin? Richard Cram is on Dancing with the Stars?
am I wrong? It’s getting hard to track my heroes.
I hear Jose Angel is living in New Caledonia.
thanks for the great post