There's plenty of good and bad advice floating around about "how to be a surfer."
I'll offer up my own recycled maxim: Commit to Your Position.
I've found this approach useful when it comes to late drops, hucking sections, and expressing your opinion. It's best not to worry too much about whether your position is right or wrong - just commit to it and see what happens.
In that spirit, Comment of the Week returns to Blasphemy Rottmouth, who employed an unexpected hint of subtlety in the following remark.
Blasphemy Rottmouth says: June 10, 2009 at 11:33 pm
The problem is that The WolfPack / Hui / BraBoys / HBTrannyCunnilingousCrew’s lifestyles, directly benefit the ruling elite in corporate surfing culture, who have built the capitalist machine into this planet ruining consumption device. For their plan to work, the world would have to have infinite and easy resources to burn, and also be an infinitely deep garbage dump. Obviously, the world is not such a thing. So, the Keynesian consumerist model of capitalism, and the narcissistic bobbleheads that are its grandchildren, are destined for the trashbin of history.
On a personal level, the likes of JOB and Barca and even (dare I say) The Irons Brothers (!), are in for a very rude awakening. They will see their methods of gratification reduce as they find themselves increasingly threatened and impoverished, and utterly incapable of doing the simplest things for themselves.
Does Barca know how to darn his own socks, build a fire, can vegetables, grow vegetables, plant a tree, or even know what KINDS of trees to plant for specific purposes (heat/shade/food/wood fabrication)? Can JOB even cook his own meals or bake anything? If one of the Iron’s Brothers had to rewire part of his house, could he do it? Can they fix a broken stair? Make glue? Fix a bicycle? These are just some of the simpler tasks that will be *required* knowledge as we slip down the backside of the petroleum curve.
In conclusion: feeding the attention of the likes of The WolfPack don’t help mental midgets like Dustin, Brucie or Jamie. What would help them? Public service. Helping others. Every – fucking - day.
Look, they aren’t COMPLETELY retarded. And they could do well in such a world. It would build something in them that is clearly less than familiar.
It’s called depth of character.
(Steps off the podium, belches, grabs his snifter of Jamison and heads for the exit…
… see you all next week!)
JOB’s juvenile love of rap music, is like kieki who only want to eat sweets and candy. Over time they mature and discover the rest of the isles at Foodland with nutritious foods that will help you grow no rot da mouth. Sweets are good occasionally, but too much and bumbye you toothless and insulin dependent.
Andy and Bruce do serve up a grom contest every year, where the show up and pat backs, give away some of their sponsors stuff. But beyond that very few give back enough… it’s all about me, me and me.
Seems a lot of the guys could take note from NBA & NFL about giving back to the community. The ASP should make this mandatory.
As brilliant and spot on as this comment is, isn’t it a bit gratuitious to reward yourself by proxy through your pseudonym? Will you eventually refer to yourself in the third person Lewis?
Big Warning boys, the third quarter of this year is going to be a catastrophe economically. Blind adherence to unregulated capitalism has no sustainbility, and the crash of this house of cards ( credit based economy) during the inevitable wind will be disastrous. For those of you who think the bottom has been found, think again with a loaded tool, sufficient supplies of non perishable food and water and if possible, one ounce of gold per family member. That’s why Bush’s bailout was so urgent, he needed to delay the carefully planned inevitable and frame a new president. Don’t believe me? Manipulated energy (Enron) colluded with the GOP to install Arnold in Cali. California is now fucked, and the nation will follow as always.
Our “surf stars” will have a crash landing as the cocoon of self promotion ( advertising) dissolves. They will be incapable humans and sorry Blasph, that means incapable of public service. Just like a generation of distracted, entitled youth who are being raised in an era of credit consuption and technological distraction.
But all those Loans will become due…. courtesy of foreign banks who don’t give a shit about twitter.
For those with cash reserves, travel this autumn ( Northern Hemi) will find crowds reminiscent of the 1950’s at your favorite, overplayed destinations. With every decline comes an opportunity. Think.
P.S. Jordy’s flip is sick.
Apparently, Mark was right, annoint the new king.
Even with Billabong helping out, some of the swag from the last AI/BI grom event had “Iron’s Brothers” written on it. Not even Mark would make that mistake.
T.S.O.T.C.
Too surfed out to comment.
BR gets point for commitment, I guess, but that post made no sense. It’s fun to make alarmist statements, but I don’t think we’re going to need to make our own glue anytime soon. Also, there’s no such thing as a “Keynesian consumerist model of capitalism”, but nice job randomly combining impressive-sounding words.
Hm, I just had to google “Keynesian consumerist model of capitalism”. Only 2 hits. And based on those two hits, it looks like BR is either a reader of hotchickswithdouchebags.com, or he’s plagiarizing blog posts. I guess I hope it’s the former. Either way he loses points for originality. Here’s an except from the post (made on Nov. 10, 2008): (the post can be found at )
“The problem is, their lifestyle directly benefits the ruling elite who have built the capitalist machine into this planet ruining consumption device. For their plan to work, the world would have to have infinite and easy resources to burn, and also be an infinitely deep garbage dump. Obviously, the world is not such a thing, so, the Keynesian consumerist model of capitalism and the narcissistic douchebags that are its grandchildren, are destined for the trashbin of history.
On a personal level, the likes of Donk and FishSlap and even (dare I say) Samurai Scrote (!), are in for a very rude awakening. They will see their methods of gratification reduce as they find themselves increasingly threatened and impoverished, and utterly incapable of doing the simplest things for themselves.
Does the Donk know how to darn his own socks, build a fire, can vegetables, grow vegetables, plant a tree, or even know what KINDS of trees to plant for specific purposes (heat/shade/food/wood fabrication)? Can he even cook his own meals or bake anything? If he had to rewire part of his house, could he do it? Can he fix a broken stair? Make glue? Fix a bicycle? These are just some of the simpler tasks that will be *required* knowledge as we slip down the backside of the petroleum curve.”
Damn BR, that’s some shit right there. You’re looking like Bill Clinton with a stinky cigar in hand right about now.
The only way to save face now is for BR to use his real last name, like I do.
No wonder that comment made more sense than a normal BR comment.
Now I don’t know who to trust! This kind of throws a monkey wrench into the whole “lewis is blashpemy rottmouth” theory.
LS says a lot of stupid ass shit on this site but I doubt he’s so stupid as to plagiarize a comment and then give himself an award for it, as if no one would ever notice.
@Mike
Lighten up Francis.
@Test
You must pursue this fraud brought upon Lewis.
I called BR out on this type of shit way back when. First as Sesquipidalian, to point out BR’s thesaurus abuse, then subsequently using few other monikers such as the one used above. Of course, then I began using my real name, which BR has still not yet begun to do.
He just went from many monikers to BR, then back to AI’s Dealer, Occy’s Underbite, and Mr. Meatwhistle.
Do I still enjoy a lewd and twisted BR non sequitur? Absolutely. Even if that is his pony’s one trick.
Of course it is possible that BR is Steve Zodiac.
The most disappointing fact is that BR goes to such a fucking retarded website. …And comments (at least if he is Steve Zodiac).
I confess myself disappointed, this must not stand…
I guess it kind of makes sense that if BR were to plagiarize he would do it from a site called hotchickswithdouchebags.com. Then again, maybe he has a deal with them to bring in new users and get a cut on the clicks. Or he’s just trying to build up his street cred by making us think he’s as sick an individual in real life as he is commenting is here on PS. I mean, really, who would want to check out shots of chicks (even if they’re hot) holding or doing who knows what else with douche bags? Makes me want to puke, and definitely not a turn on.
@Mark “Jones” and Stu “Smith”, yeah right! Unless Lewis would be kind enough to verify that those really are your last names…
After reading some of the prior comments we are compelled to offer a quick remedial in economic theory. The Keynesian school purports that governments stimulate ailing economies through government spending and tax cuts- some what akin to Obama’s current moves (although this is also contested as “Black Hole economics”). Relevant to Mr. Sammuels comment, a major point of concern in Keyensian economics is “excessive saving”- thought to be a serious problem to economies. In other words Keynesian economics looks also at individual behavior and requires the individual to spend, spend, spend.
Moving on, our 3 to 5 year economic outlook is poor and sees serious economic hurdles obstructing even slight recovery. One of our pink elephants in the room is in the form of commercial business & Alt A loans. It will take 4 to 6 years at best for the market to absorb this pending calamity. We strongly object to, and consider it a public disservice, that CEO’s and various public officials knowingly purport erroneous tales of turnaround, “1st qtr 2010 will really leap”, etc. These shutzpahs are well informed to this pending disaster and merely maintaining a pr campaign.
With recovery dependent on consumer spending this will be a journey long and painful. Why will consumers start spending again (grossly overconsuming)? Key, will be a progression through several stages: a significant decrease in unemployment, reduction in personal debt, accumulation of savings to a comfortable level of security, and finally a desire to spend. We concede that certain anomalies exist in this theory, namely the flatscreen market which still maintains growing sales. Oi’!
Our current recommendation advises complete divestiture from securities and real estate if not done so already. A significant portion of the proceeds should be funneled to weapons and non-perishable food stocks. We see urban environments morphing into dangerous stages with hungry, roving gangs of those unprepared for the apocalypse. Families should have several assault style rifles and substantial ammunition. We suggest AR-15’s or similar rifles using widely available .223 rounds. In addition family patriarchs should consider carrying side arms. Again 9mm are suggested based on the availability of ammunition. Further information should be sought from survivalist websites.
Should have went with Hank the Plank Paulson’s original plan of buying up all the supposedly junk paper, with the government holding it for the long term.
This action would have cleared markets immediately, and turned into another Alaskan Purchase. Huge gains on behalf of the government for the citizenry.
Instead we had the Congress and Senate get in the way and absolutely make a mess of the whole thing.
Bureaucracy. Blah!
Yeah, that’s some plagiarism shit right there. BR, -10.
Thanks for the shout out Lewis. I don’t comment here for the accolades, as you know.
But, it feels good to know the effort gets rewarded every now and again.
And to those who cry foul… a pox uponst your houses for being waaaaaay too slow.
But, you had fun while it lasted, didn’t you?
heh heh heh.
I guarantee that the Iron boys can fish for their food and happily give away that catch to friends and family as well.
BR might be able to fix a bike but ranting about what pro surfers can’t do is his true purpose.
Thanks for the insight there BR, now get back to writing add for your local paper.