Comment of the Weak

Posted by lewis on June 21, 2009 at 6:26 am.

I remember it like it was yesterday. It was one of those defining moments in my life.

I was standing at my office window, checking the surf, and thumbing through the latest issue of Transworld Surf. It was a self-congratulatory anniversary issue – celebrating 10 years or 100 issues or something like that. OK, so maybe I don’t remember the moment that well.

What I do remember is this: in that issue, Transworld editor Chris Cote explained that, when forced to define the new, ultra-radical brand of surfing popularized in recent years, TW editors “invented” a new word: Modernism.

In that instant, faced with Transworld’s seemingly irony-free, yet ultra-ironic claim, I knew that PostSurf had to exist. PostSurf is a simple scratch at the scabies-like itch of surf industry moments just like that one.

Cut to the present. PostSurf is whatever the custard-fuck it is. And Chris Cote? He’s a regular commenter, and now a winner of Comment of the Week!

chris before the self loathing kicks in.

Chris Cote says:

June 16, 2009 at 7:52 am

Wait till Owen turns 30, he’ll be right there with the rest of us punching himself in the face in the parking lot of Baskin Robbins crying tears of regret into a half-eaten bowl of sadness flavored sherbert.

Is there a word that describes a common hatred toward skinny people? Weightism?

38 Comments

  • saltynuts says:

    if you write something under this comment you are a homo

  • Dave Mailman says:

    Ah, Chris Coté in all his glory… A very poignant comment unless Owen goes on to be a consistent Top 5 surfer, in which case the story might end up somewhat differently.

    @saltynuts, my fiancée begs to differ.

  • West Hollywood says:

    Not that there is anything wrong with that!

  • PacNW says:

    I like reading the comments of Cote and Mailman. Quite aside, these are two unique surnames. While we’ve established that Mailman is not a pseudonym. How about ‘Cote’? Pen-name? Do French girls dig ‘Chris Coast’ the most? Or is Cote from the old English, meaning a small pigeon coop?

    Sincerely,
    John Brandon

  • Mike says:

    Wow, Chris got only one “e”…. there goes Mark’s pedestal, not that he’ll notice because his dictionary is the same width as his bible and he’s not inclined to read much anyway.

    Wow. Dave is getting married while living on the beach in france with naked chicks frolicking in the dunes in the foreground of perfect surf. Better sign a pre nup, it’s only a matter of time.

    Wow. West Hollywood has not been represented in the “surf” lexicon since Matt Warshaw decided to live there…. not that there is anything wrong with that. Guess the move to OB was an attempt to butch it up a bit.

    Wow. Lewis reads TWS…. well, skims through it quickly waiting for his latte’. Problem is, he fully absorbed any intellectual qualities in mere moments. Not to suggest Samuels isn’t bright, but that may not be an ability exclusive to him.

    Wow. Cote is questioning the next big thing, Wright. Kid looks money to me, top 10 straight out of the gate. Wonder if Rip Curl will be making a phone call to the Editor’s desk tomorrow about 8:01 AM. Lewis only clowned a surf executive for hyperbole regarding some Cloudbreak shampoo’s and look where that got him… on the sidelines with the rest of us fuckeries. God’s speed CC.

  • Mike says:

    Wow. So much to say…. when I really wanted to comment on the children eating poison at Mc Donalds. Great snapshot Lewie of Americana.

  • Stu Smith says:

    Congrats, Chris. You’re the man…at least until you’re replaced like Evan Slaterbro.

  • West Hollywood says:

    Modernism??? Owen seems much more Dada to me.

  • Mike says:

    Hey Stu, what is the “broism” for getting fired?

    Secondly, I have to be in Newps on Tuesday, should I even bring a board?

  • Astonished says:

    How did Lewis get the archive of Adam Virs’ baby pictures?

  • bird slayer says:

    a lot of food is sadness flavored
    more and more these days
    ice cream sales are way up as people reach for
    their comfort foods to ward off an uncertain future

  • Occy's Mum says:

    @ Salty, funny man, funny.

  • Taj's Burro says:

    Cote didn’t invent SHIT!!!

    Paul Weller wrote, recorded, and produced an album for his collective band, The Style Council titled “Modernism”, twenty freaking years ago!!!!

    House music before house music was house music.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Style_Council

  • Taj's Burro says:

    Dj’s carrying it on ya’ll, into the future.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x9t2iA4R3bI

  • warshaw, kampion, Hynd and Hawk says:

    We predict Cote will be waiting tables at the Claim Jumper by July 4th.

  • SmyrnaJeff says:

    Dayum Lewis! Where’d you get that picture of me and Mark at the Panama City Mcdonalds back in the day?

  • F. Murray Abrahambone says:

    Lol@ Astonished 10:36am

  • Mike says:

    @Smyrna That must be Mark on the right side of the photo, he’s always on the right.

    Wouldn’t it be cool to see you guys reproduce that photo today?! Of course, You’ll have to fly to Oahu, but there is plenty of Mickie D’s over there and Mark could lend you his SUP that he rides without a paddle. Least thats what JOB tells me.

    Aint there no damn NASCAR on TV today, Jeffy?

  • SmyrnaJeff says:

    @ Mike

    Fishin with Crawford and Reineke right now bud. I’ll hollah at ya latah.

  • Alex says:

    If any publicity is good publicity, you just helped out Cote and his shitty mag. Nice work Lewis.

  • Occy's Underbite says:

    I predict that Chris Cote will continue keeping the wiener’s of Thai trannies wet until the day TWS does something interesting enough to make me crack the cover.

    In other words… forever.

  • Mike says:

    Promises, promises Smyrna….

    Any truth to the rumor that Mark quit post surf again?

    You do know how difficult that will be on you once Mark passes you the target he has been wearing.

    So when you guys go Deliverance camping, which one of you squeals?

  • Hugh G. Rection says:

    Is that Chris’ offspring at McCafe?

  • Stu Smith says:

    Mike - always a chance, but don’t count on much…

  • Mike says:

    I’ll be prepared regardless of whether Maggie is in the mood.

  • scott says:

    you spelled week wrong lewis you stupid fuck. Can I call you lewDog?

  • Cote D'Azur says:

    Chris Cote said that cos that’s what happened to him. Gone is the cherubic smile that the Japanese maidens so loved, when Surfer sent him over there to chill. Gone is the golden hair that flowed in the wind, as Cote dropped into 1 foot slop. Gone are those days my friends. Listen up Cote: Rise up again like the Phoenix, rise up from the ashes of yesteryear into the “modernity”of the eons. Or get your other butt cheek branded like cattle from this cruel industry of the tide.

  • Perez Hilton says:

    Fuck you Samuels, I’m better than you

  • Pobby Brown says:

    You Kant be serious . . .

  • LongDuckDong says:

    What the herr. where you get my baby photo?

  • who isnt laughing with this guy? says:

    whoisjob
    Sticker placement is art. My art. I am the best. This role will require immense talent. I seek a savant of logo placement and white space.

  • Chris Cote says:

    Thank you, thank you.

    I’m sorry for calling all you posters “surf industry wanna-bees hiding behind vaginal shields of anonymity” Post Surf has made me a better person, writer, and even humbled me a tiny tiny bit.

    I’m on a diet by the way.

    Lewis, Surf Film Debate, you and me, mano e’ mano, New York Film Festival. Suits, ties, glasses, podiums, big words, note cards, hard alcohol … lets do this.

    How would you phrase the debate question though? “What makes for a good surf film?” “Art vs. Action: The Surf Film debate” “Occy’s air in Beyond Blazing Boards made me want to surf, why?” “Why were so many people smoking pot at the premiere of Surfers: Take two at La Paloma Theater?” “Is Runman 69 the best surf film ever made?”

  • KevNYC says:

    Sherbet, not sherbert

  • Dave Mailman says:

    Guys, it’s not Cote (which has no meaning that I know of), nor Côte (which means “the coast”, but Coté, which is a mis-spelling of “côté” or “side” in French, as in “laisser le sur le côté de la route”, or “leave him(it) on the side of the road”… So, yeah, Coté is kind of French… Or at least he blends in well with all the drunken’ Euro tourists, when he’s over here perving on naked girls on the beach (and sometimes in the bars)and passing it off as work! Love your act, Chris! Keep charging!

  • Dave Mailman says:

    Coté and Lewis, for the surf movie debate, you need to have Phil Jarratt moderate. Now that would be classic!

  • PeterPerfect says:

    Wow, surf industry love-in. What’s next? Donovan is missunderstood? Knost is a renaissance man? GT is a great guy once you meet him and he’s not gay, by the way? Lewis, you’re not at Shitline anymore. Harden the fuck up.
    Oh, and fuck you Mark.

  • Mike says:

    Runman 69 is the best film ever?? When you think about it Chris, Morgan was so lucky to capture all those mysto spots on one video. None of those waves have broken in 3 years….

    But the trash can deal was disaster waiting to happen.

    Funny stuff.

  • yourmum says:

    chris cote is a faggy douchebag with a faggy dog.

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