The Handicapper General

Posted by lewis on August 13, 2009 at 10:47 am.

"THE YEAR WAS 2081, and everybody was finally equal. They weren’t only equal before God and the law. They were equal every which way. Nobody was smarter than anybody else. Nobody was better looking than anybody else. Nobody was stronger or quicker than anybody else. All this equality was due to the 211th, 212th, and 213th Amendments to the Constitution, and to the unceasing vigilance of agents of the United States Handicapper General." -- Kurt Vonnegut, from "Harrison Bergeron," 1961.

picture-2

First off: Yes, I owe a great deal to Derek Hynd, whose Top 30 reviews in Surfer Magazine fueled my pre-teen obsession with professional surfing and greatly influenced my creation of the Power Rankings.  Derek has a great gift for making the mundane seem interesting - he successfully romanticized the relevance of shithouse beachbreak contests 20 years ago, and that's impressive.  Now he's taking a shot at proving the validity of finless surfboards.

In a recent article on Surfline, Mr Hynd's shown surfing finless boards with youngsters Cyrus Sutton and Ryan Birch.  After looking at the photos, it struck me that if the surfer wasn't using a finless board, not one of the images in the article would be considered even vaguely interesting.

Yes, they do 360s.  But minus the 360s, the surfing depicted in stills and video looks roughly equivalent to that of any first-year surfer.  And the 360s? It's pretty easy to spin around when you have no fins. Even with fins, it's pretty easy to do a sliding 360 - they were perfected and then shunned by everyone except boogie-boarders back in the early 80s, and again in the mid 90s.  (Carving 360s are a different matter - compare Slater's recent Huntington Power Circle to a finless 360 and you'll get the idea.)

picture-1

So what the hell's going on here, other than the continued marketing of homogenized individualism?

What we're left with, once you remove the novelty, is the obvious: good surfers handicapping themselves via the use of dysfunctional equipment.  It's Harrison Bergeron come to life - except instead of legislated mediocrity, we're witnessing self-induced handicapping.  In Vonnegut's story, the strong are made to carry enormous weights so they will no longer be stronger than anybody else.

In 2009, skilled surfers ride finless, volumeless boards, allowing them to surf Cardiff reef just as badly as a newbie kook or decrepit longboarder.  Everyone's equal.  And I suppose there's some beauty in that.

Even better, perhaps the finless surfboard trend will spread to the unskilled masses, like the plague of SUPs and retrofish.  If finless surfboards are our future, then they will certainly be Mr. Hynd's greatest contribution to surfing.

I anticipate with glee a Utopian future in which I paddle out on the best day of the year to a lineup crowded with Alaia riders and kooks on finless Derek Hynd models.  They'll snicker at my oh-so-uncool stock-standard thruster.  But in this case there's a price to be paid for fashion -- while SUPs help the unskilled catch more waves, Alaias will help them catch far less.  And the vast majority will fall flat on their face once they catch a decent wave - like athletes trying to run sprints in $300 Parisian couture high heels. The barrels will go to the unhip, stuck on their out-of-style thrusters.

So, upon consideration, I have slightly revised my position on finless surfboards.  Don't knock them till you've tried them.  (Personally, I don't plan to purchase one - I've already done my time, skimboarding in my pre-teen years.)  But I highy suggest that everyone else out there sell their SUPs or longboards and purchase Alaias immediately.  If you care about surfing, and care about being cool, it's the right thing to do.

103 Comments

  • Stranger Than Fiction says:

    hey whats up? this is my second time posting, hello to everyone.

  • huh says:

    @stranger than fiction

    What is the point of even posting if you don’t say anything of any meaning?

  • bone an raized says:

    Derek’s wave at Jeffery’s says it all. Quite an accomplishment on a finless board. Had he been riding a
    finned board he would have stayed higher, tighter in the pocket, and actually made the wave.
    He says it’s brought fun back to his surfing. Good for Derek. If he can only make a twenty yard section at Jeffery’s, Good for the rest of us.

  • BrodyStylez says:

    Hynd is one of the few professional surfers who I considered to be intelligent, and as I recall, also paid dearly for questioning the industry’s authority. Hopefully this finless thing is indeed a well-orchestrated ploy to disconnect fashionistas from equipment that gives them a paddling advantage.

    However, I must admit that I have had an enjoyable time this summer learning to ride a boogieboard standing up. As queer as it may seem, I think it provides a fun option for high-tide shorepound that would quickly demolish a shortboard. I find it less homoerotic than riding a longboard, and it functions well in similar slop conditions. May harassment ensue.

  • The Nug says:

    What constitutes good surfing isn’t how it looks… but how it feels—George Greenough

  • @ Lewis: You’re beginning to sound like one of the boys at Salt Creek instead of one of the boys at Bolinas. Seriously. What’s with your megalomaniacal fantasy of outsurfing everyone in the lineup? That’s quite possibly the most frightening vision of surfing’s future to which I’ve been subjected. Please refrain from any future attempts at channeling the prescient mind of POSTradamus.

  • @ The Nug: I now agree with you on more than just your choice of hairstyle.

  • Dave Mailman says:

    Can’t argue with George Greenough, or in this case with The Nug either. Don’t think finless boards will be the next big thing, but nothing wrong with giving yourself a little challenge every now and then… Go DH!

  • bdub says:

    I don’t know about you guys, but I am stoked to not be a part of another cool trend. Waiting for the onshores to kick, in so I can practice airs. Me and my kook friends will stick to the early morning offshore barrels.

  • killedbydeath says:

    ya those clips in shitty beachbreak were lame. but that high line spinning 360 derek hynd did straight into the barrel was siick. however on a normal board you would have been able to get barrelled much longer and come out somewhere far down the point.

  • yakas says:

    I didnt even read your comments lewis, but when i saw that story i thought this fad has to stop. although the wave at jaybay was cool for a second then he almost killed that guy. I will go back now and read what you have to say

  • MCLite says:

    right on lewis…agreed completely

  • al says:

    i was frightened by picture number 16 from that article. that kid had giant teeth

  • al says:

    also, its funny how the pictures say bonus audio, because i don’t think the audio is really a bonus

  • yakas says:

    thank god for sheep, without them, the viscous snippery that persists at rincon would be at the other end of the vonnegut spectrum - everyone would be on thrusters of quads. at least we have excuses for being part of the pack of wolves.

  • Dave Mailman says:

    Tired of BR’s homoerotica? DH and his finless boards too retro for you? Check out the latest musings from Dane Reynolds…

    http://www.stabmag.com/jed/Dane-Reynolds-independent-surf-film-footage/

    Seriously, it’s worth it!

  • I am most influenced by Vonnegut’s other famous line:

    “I tell you, we are here on Earth to fart around, and don’t let anybody tell you different.”

    True Story.

  • @Mailman,

    You should start your own blog where all you do is link to other blogs. It would be like an endless circle of people spoon-feeding shit into other people’s buttholes.

    And I might even read it.

    And I know KilledbyDeath would read it.

  • ry says:

    The caveman in Ventura has been riding finless for years. He claims his record is 36 360s on one wave. He also some times plays the kazoo and twirls party favors while riding. Classic character, apparently way ahead of the curve.

  • Wagner Wolfhurst says:

    Why not just cover all bases and get a SUP Alaia. Then, all the cool aspects of trendsurfing are covered in one giant bag of suck.

  • ted says:

    A few months ago, I was staring down the barrel of another long summer on the East coast, dreading the weeks of flatness and groveling on the old thruster when I had a medium sized epiphany. After an entire lifetime of riding nothing but sweet sweet tri fins (I even learned on a 6′2), I realized that I just couldn’t face another three to four months of groveling in shitty, weak surf. There is only so much indignity that a man can take in his life, and after too many years of east coast summers, something broke inside me. I hate doing floaters because I don’t have the speed to hit the lip. I hate head dipping into “barrels”. I hate slow cut backs that threaten the constant rail bog. I hate small surf.
    Around this time, a local shop got in a shipment of John Wegener alaias. Remember, this is NYC, the universal capital of asinine trends. I bought one because i liked the shape, the wood, and the general simplicity of riding an improbably thin plank. Over two months later, I’m still figuring it out, but I can now whip around those 360’s and make steeper drops that sent me flopping off in the beginning. Is it the next great thing in surfing? Well, no. Hence, it was discontinued hundreds of years ago. But it is the most fun i have had in knee high surf, ever. The genius of it really hit me when I was surfing Montauk in the midst of a pack of sea sweepers. There I was, neck deep in the water while they paddled around me in their Matuse wetsuits, hats, hundred dollar brooms, and, of course, self promoting t-shirts. In an era where less is more, the alaia is a very little thing that is a lot of fun. I just wish i had learned how to make one, instead of having to skip months of meals to afford mine.

    ps: I don’t know what the difference in between “sliding” and “carving” 360’s. I thought I was doing the carving kind on my thruster, but now i’m a little worried that I’m not.

  • Taj's Burro™ says:

    Derek Hynd. Busy, busy, busy.

    Assisting the stuppa towards his version of foma.

  • Taj's Burro™ says:

    BR, this from KV’s Cats Craddle pretty much sums up DH.

    Bokononism and all its texts, is formed entirely of lies; however, if you believe and adhere to these lies, you will live a good life.

  • @Taj’s Burrow,

    Another great KV qote could apply to 90% of the people who willingly go to other people’s blogs, read them, then take the time to formulate a verbal fart like, “this sucks, i don’t get it, you suck and everything you wrote is dumb”…

    “Any reviewer who expresses rage and loathing for a [this blog] is preposterous. He or she is like a person who has put on full armor and attacked a hot fudge sundae.”

  • The Nug says:

    I’m pretty sure Bukowski was talking about Alaias when he wrote…

    “Sometimes you just have to pee in the sink.”

  • Wasn’t it P.J. O’Rourke that once said of Cyrus Sutton and Ryan Birch:

    “Giving money and alaias to surfshops is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.”

    He also said, “Retro boards are messy, clinging, and of an annoying and repetitive pattern, like bad wallpaper.”

  • Socrates once said:

    “An alaias-toting man is always a child.”

  • Selly Klater says:

    Score! I just ordered a finless retro SUP alaia. My wife thinks its cool!!!

  • My favorite was Plato:

    “Apply yourself both now and in the next life. Without effort, you cannot be prosperous. Though the land be good, you cannot have an abundant cock without abundant masturbation.”

  • Chief Grunting Bearscat:

    “Him who hang-ten longest, have cock shorter than boll weevil.”

  • Chris Won says:

    Someone mention finless surfing?

  • Chris Won says:

    Someone mention finless surfing?

  • daveyjoneslizard says:

    looks like BR isn’t the only blogger having their debutante ball today:

    http://gizmodo.com/5331942/laird-hamilton-4-new-ways-to-surf

    “after kalama and i invented polyurethane resin and won the nobel prize in chemistry, we were like– man, this would be perfect for tow surfing behind a harnessed albatross on the antarctic circumpolar current. you know they never land? never.”

  • The Nug says:

    All these great quotes reminded me I booked these guys to play my funeral. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lQkzHU_U45s

    Shit. I just thought of something. What if they die before me? That would suck.

  • The Nug says:

    I once saw Chris Won do a no paddle drop-in 360 on 8-inch cobblestone he grabbed from the shore at Churches. Yeah, he threw it at a longboarder, killing him instantly, but still. Impressive. Every time I see “Into the Blue” I think about it. That and Jessica Alba’s ass.

  • BVBVBVBVBVBVBV says:

    So, ButtRott, your asscracking through stacks of books trying to “catch up.”Good luck.

  • conan's daddy says:

    parisian couture heels….?

    i have to admit i didn’t see it until today, but when it occured to me i fired my assitant for not noticing what this website was really all leading up to………

    “PostSurf,” “Take a glimpse into the lives of difficult surf celebrities after they go surfing, Bravo TV 8pm Thurs…”

    Get out your hair gel, we’re gonna be famous….conan’s daddy

  • I once saw Chris Won surf Snapper on a festoon made of midget’s teeth and BVB’s taint hairs. It smelled like a fart trapped inside a roll of Rosie O’Donnell’s waist being released for the first time in thirty years; but when Chris pulled those bottom turns, we ALMOST didn’t care.

  • The Nug says:

    Why doesn’t Lewis ever give props to Kneeboarders? Maybe he’ll profile Bill Sharp and ask if he prefers standing on the boat while he watches surfers charge big waves or does he prefer to perch on his knees.

  • Growler says:

    “be a boozer, not a loozer”

  • Growler says:

    “be a boozer, not a loozer”

  • Dave Mailman says:

    Now that’s the Blasphemy Rottmouth we all know and love (even BVB as he needs an imaginary foil)!

    @BR, If I use you’re idea, I’ll give you credit for it in my first post!

  • john says:

    Why was the fog orange this morning ? Did anybody else notice that, or am i on glue ?

  • Glazed and Confused says:

    @John - I don’t know, but it was tripping me out. Do you live in Nebraska too?!

  • trauzersnake says:

    TAGS: BVB;butthole;cumdumpster;cockface;drug-addled;geezer;kook;jism rod;asshat

  • Dave Mailman says:

    BR, sorry, that would be YOUR idea…

  • Lance says:

    Ya Lewis I’m on it I am immmediately going to swap my awesome SUP for one of these really great looking finless boards. Maybe now people will think i’m cool and accept me for who I really am a trend setter. I mean I already have the retro Occy boardshorts that Billabong put out as well has the retro 80’s reissue Oakley glasses. Let me tell you they were expensive but you got to pay to be cool. WOO HOO!!!

  • lazer® says:

    A sad majority of these comments leads to the inevitable conclusion that you hare-brained fluffers wouldn’t recognize sarcasm if it shit on your rug and then did some 360s on it.

    Alaias are nothing more than overpriced McDonald’s trays, which were used before we could afford real boards. For those of you who want to be trend-setters, try getting to your feet without that pitiful half-step knee crouch; you look like a bunch of goddam rehabilitated orthotricyclen-snorting epileptics.

  • Robert's Your Mother's Brother says:

    Another bored ex-pro surfer trying to cope with aging. I used to think Derek was smart and cool, but he just can’t let go apparrently.

    The whole ‘Retro’ ‘Litmus’ ‘Cool because were doing something different’ thing. It’s not different. It’s all been done before. Why can’t these people just admit that they are bored. Fine. But don’t tell us it’s new or the next big thing.

    How ’bout the shot of Derek and Skip Frye (23 0f 24). Funny, looks alot like the original Campbell Bros Bonzer side fins! How original.

    Sorry, I’m calling wank on this trendy ego trip.

  • Covered this shit like 6 months ago, your late bitch!
    suck it LS
    CC

  • you tell him Cote.

    wait til all yall douchies see my video part in the new rvca flick. i’m surfing solid sunset on a finless board. jamie may have otw with no fins but i rule sunset.

  • Robert's Your Mother's Brother says:

    “Chris Cote says:
    August 13, 2009 at 3:41 pm

    Covered this shit like 6 months ago, your late bitch!
    suck it LS
    CC”

    But Chris, haven’t you realized that no one reads your Transvestiteworld Surf magazine.

    And aren’t you the one who’s late? For your Hair Club For Men appointment?

    You poor wretched poodle.

  • More chicks please says:

    @Cote - you need more bikini chicks in your mag. Rottmouth is running out of masturbation materials.

  • Shreddy Roosevelt says:

    I don’t know, seems like one offense LS suffers from one of the worst human offenses–what Bukowski described as being “predictable”. I knew this article would be on this blog the moment I read it. Lewis, you need to turn yourself around, like DH sliding around a J Bay wall on a finless. So to speak.

  • Crusty Native says:

    Transworld is the only surf mag I buy these days. I do get TSJ, thanks to Mom.

  • shreddy boresevelt says:

    yep, and when the twin towers collapsed, only one news source brought forth the story.

    what are you looking for, and article on lawn care?

  • @ Chris Cote:

    I find it . . . well, typical I guess, that the Editor of a notable surf publication uses “your” as if it was the contraction for “you are.”

  • Woody Hayes says:

    “Without winners, there wouldn’t even be any god damned civilization.”

  • P.J. O'Rourke says:

    @shreddy boresevelt

    Saddam Hussein was reduced to the Unabomber — Ted Kaczynski — a nutcase hiding in the sticks. Sure, the terrorism by his supporters is frightening. Hence, its name, ‘terrorism.’ Killing innocent people by surprise is not called ‘a thousand points of light.’ But, as frightening as terrorism is, it’s the weapon of losers. The minute somebody sets off a suicide bomb, you can be sure that person doesn’t have ‘career prospects.’ And no matter how horrendous a terrorist attack is, it’s still conducted by losers. Winners don’t need to hijack airplanes. Winners have an Air Force.

  • daniel says:

    u nailed it. it’s skimboarding with a green trail of smoke.

  • ReB says:

    welcome, Stranger Than Fiction.

    i’m still trying to get an answer about Shipstern’s, why does it have that ski jump warble in the surface of the wave ?

    speaking of handicaps, i’d like to see basketball baskets about 5 feet off the ground.

  • Digga says:

    Here’s afew shots of some groms from America carving it up in NZ on a couple of finless boards earlier this year. They were pretty talented on them and looked like alot of fun. And if you were provoked I imagine they would make a good frisbee to fling at a SUP’er. http://diggasurf.wordpress.com/about/wood-boards/

  • Old Guy says:

    Finless 360’s started in the 60’s. Dale Dobson won the first contest held at Big Surf in Tempe, Arizona by taking his fin out and doing endless 360’s in the 1 foot mush.

  • BVBVBVBVBVBVBV says:

    Carried across the sand a KnostLewisretrObRonzowoodenfinnedGreenoughinspiredkneebourDMolluskNor CAL. FRIENDS AT THE BEACH.@pork@ History.comin @you in 18 foot Sunset Beach, Kauianaka.
    Key: Asshat, asphalt; addled wanna-be loser. Pork. History. @you in 18 foot Sunset Beach, Kauianakakai.
    close enough.
    The heaving 2,395, 0 wave La Prima Bosco and in @ you in 18 foot Sunset Beach, Kauianaka.
    Key: Asshat, asphalt; addled wanna-be loser. pork. History.
    Wasnʻt finless heaving 2,395,000 gunna be a good one.
    and in @you in 18 foot Sunset Beach, Kauianaka.
    Key: Asshat, asphalt; addled wanna-be loser. Pork. History.n @you in 18 foot Sunset Beach.
    Key: Asshat, asphalt; addled wanna-be loser. Facepork. History.
    “Asshat,”
    I know you.

  • JJ says:

    anyone remember ‘the hyndy’ from litmus?

  • marx's corpse says:

    derek is hilarious to watch on a wave. i saw him charging jbay a few years ago on one of his finless boards. from the shoulder he looked like some demented hunchback wizard guiding his magic carpet into insanely fast 360s. only time i’ve seen finless surfing and it looked fun and really difficult.
    derek was pulling it off with style. he had a big fucking grin on his face, too. his surfing was much more pleasant to witness than the packs of unsmiling trained monkeys you see every day hacking away at the lip ad nauseam. these typical butt wigglers resemble sex-hungry geriatrics at my grandma’s rest home, a gaggle of chronically bored masturbators. most of them have this clueless slouch in their back, the question marks forming in their shoulders that begs an answer: “where’d all the fun go?? this was so much better when i was kook on a funboard.” it all goes south for these angry, disappointed fuckwits when they realize they can’t get paid to…uhm…have fun enjoying the ocean.

    to these uninspiring human beings who make surfing their life: go run a dairy farm like derek. read a book. stop surfing for a year and come back to it refreshed. or break off your fins and be a ‘kook’ for a day. plant a garden.

  • stalin's corpse says:

    marx’s corpse is weak. you all need to take this shit further. like back to the cave man days. before they even knew how to plant their own feces.

    either that, or let’s all get inner tubes and catch white wash with big smiles on our faces.

    lord knows, as a trained monkey, i would never be caught dead doing anything someone hasn’t done before. in fact, i keep african slaves in my back yard just to show how un-progressive i am. i have a big smile on my face when i beat them slaves too, you betcha. fits right in down in south africa too.

    progressives are for them liburuls and people who don’t like things the way they always was.

  • lenin's corpse says:

    that’s right, if it makes you happy, doggoneit, then git to it. git r done as that genious comic puts it.

    pushing boundaries is for them queers.

    everyone should regres to chump levels at everything so we all have GREAT BIG SMILES ON OUR COMRADES FACES, JAAAAHH!!

  • Pobby Brown says:

    My war,
    You’re one of them.

  • The 80s says:

    Whoa, here it comes
    That funny feelin’ again windin’
    Me up inside
    Every time we touch
    Hey, I don’t know
    Oh, tell me where to begin
    ‘Cause I never ever
    Felt so much. Hey!

    And I can’t recall any love at all
    Oh baby, this blows ‘em all away

    It’s got what it takes
    So tell me why can’t this be love?
    Straight from the heart
    Oh tell me why
    Can’t this be love?

    I tell myself,
    “Hey! Only fools rush in”
    Only time will tell
    If we stand the test of time
    All I know
    You’ve got to run to win and
    I’ll damned if i’ll get caught up on the line. Hey!

    No, I can’t recall anything at all
    Oh baby, this blows ‘em all away

    Woo! It’s got what it takes
    So tell me why can’t this be love?
    You want it straight from the heart
    Oh, tell me why
    Can’t this be love?

    (Guitar Solo)

    Woo! It’s got what it takes
    So tell me why can’t this be love?
    Straight from the heart,
    Oh tell me why
    Can’t this be love?

    Baby, why can’t this be love?
    Got to know why can’t this be love?
    I wanna know why can’t this be love?

  • Dick Broome says:

    @Ry - I saw caveman pump down the line, then go off the lip and do an el-rollo to prone position, then stand back up and do a few 360’s at a rare point in SB. That guy can surf. How old is he? It was about 8 years ago when I saw him do that and I was blown away that an older guy could do that.

    @LS - Good luck finding any Parisian Couture anything for $300.

  • al says:

    seriously did anybody see the size of that kids teeth on the 16th picture…unreal

  • yakas says:

    is this caveman named foo

  • Pobby Brown says:

    I remember being completely flummoxed the first time I met someone who actually preferred Van Hagar to Van Halen.

  • The Nug says:

    @Pobby Brown
    I would have killed him (*after I drank all his Cabo Wabo)

  • Standards says:

    Can we please issue a moratorium on the following trite literary device routinely employed by one Blasphemic Rottmouth?…

    And by ______, I mean _______ (insert completely unrelated absurdity).

    And by moratorium, I mean moratorium. That is all.

  • Ballz says:

    Mr. Hagar said it best, “Only time will tell if we pass the test of time.” Similarly, only a finger wedged directly between my sweaty ball sack and thigh and then inserted into my mouth can tell if I pass the test of deliciousness.

  • trauzersnake says:

    BVB SUX DIX BVB SUX DIX BVB SUX DIX BVB SUX DIX BVBVBVB SUX DIX

  • Ballz says:

    This just in…I pass!

  • trauzersnake says:

    @Ballz

    BVB is now salivating.

  • dirty nappies says:

    the emperor has no clothes

  • Shreddy Roosevelt says:

    shreddy boresevelt = Blasphemy Rottmouth. Dude, please don’t use my name in veins. Somebody’s all hurt because BR and LS got all cwiticized. So many sheep on both sides of the surfing fence.

  • shreddy boresevelt says:

    don’t you wish. why do insist on sitting on the fence?

  • shreddy boresevelt says:

    and why don’t you ever contribute anything useful to this site?

  • shreddy boresevelt says:

    scratch that, don’t. i already have enough ambien…

  • God says:

    I’m sorry, who is Derek Hynd again? Is he related to Mike, Mark or Stu?

  • Crusty Native says:

    fin less mind less fun
    danger kooks run over you
    splinter in your ass

  • Crusty Native says:

    missed a syllable

  • Haiku Patrol says:

    Actually, that was a good haiku Crusty. 5-7-5 was maintained. Lmao!

  • Standard's correct says:

    Right on, standard. Not many notice the repeated template formula of BR’s writing.

    Drinking game:
    -Drink every time BR uses what Standard referred to.
    -Or, drink every time BR has someone’s eye socket (or some other version of eye socket ie. ocular cavity) fucked.
    -Or, drink every thirteenth time you come across blatant thesaurus abuse (or, if we give him the benefit of an undergrad’s vocabulary, drink every thirteenth time you come across awkward and unstylistic use of said vocabulary).

    The new Postsurf readers enjoy him, the super-fans too (these type fervently support anything), those who bore easily with formulaic diatribe think otherwise.

  • elephant says:

    @standard’s correct-

    hi mark!

  • elephant says:

    I suppose those who shun the use of a thesaurus are mentally superior in that they always have easy access to their assholes.

  • elephant says:

    Yes, we’ll wait for your superior wit to give us all a run for our money….

    tic… toc…

  • Heh heh heh. You children be careful not to crap your new pull-ups while you fling paste at each other.

  • elephant (in the room) says:

    Ehhh, correct me if I’m wrong, but a formulaic diatribe involving a semi-professional surfer, chinchilla tails and windowless vans didn’t bring any successful results in Google.

    Should I search H.P. Lovecraft quotes and surfing to get more of this formulaic prose?

    I’m at a loss.

    Obviously, Shreddy Roosevelt holds the key to the Pop-Surfing Blog that I’m evidently missing.

  • Doody says:

    @stranger than fiction

    you rock! ah loves ya!

  • Is your connection hanging? try to use an internet speedometer to compare your speed to your friends.

  • Mattie Tok says:

    I like Jessica Alba ! I am touched by her smile everytime I notice her pictures…

  • Alvaro Nolda says:

    Couldn?t be written any better. Reading this post reminds me of my old room mate! He always kept talking about this. I will forward this article to him. Pretty sure he will have a good read. Thanks for sharing!

  • Took me values bright and early to scan all the comments, but I really enjoyed the article. It proved to be Vastly helpful to me and I am undeviating to all the commenters here! It’s each time delightful when you can not no greater than be informed, but also entertained! I’m stable you had rag theme this article.

  • As I had some free time, I was going through some blogs to read something interesting. I was not successful until I found yours. Thank you for such a great post.

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